Dear CLUELESS,

Thank you for using our spyware!

By mothership is meant 'the mother of all ships', i.e. in this case something that can make even a chaos theoretician a bit panicky.

The web page has been hijacked by aliens. Our representatives are on their way to Bel-Air right now to attempt to secure assistance in having it returned to us.

What soes the silencer do? The silencer soes many thingd! Well it silences thingd mostly.

If, for example, a hostile application should discover that we are ALL aliens and we are ALL beaming back IMPORTANT INFORMATION to the MOTHERSHIP, then Silencer will disintegrate the application using high-grade military classified laser technology and a piano wire.

The EULA is personal. You must read it before morning coffee. You must read to the end of every sentence, and you should not use your finger to follow along with the lines.

You may not let anyone else read your EULA. If you let someone else read your EULA, your license will become null and void forthwith and your registration fee is forfeit and your vendor retains the right to exercise "self-help" in shutting your computer down by remote control (e.g. e-mail) until you demonstrate by a means satisfactory to your vendor that you have removed the software from your computer.

We're very glad you hvae the ad-aware from lavasoft. As they are the only distributors of this excellent GERMAN program, knowing it comes from the right distributor means a lot. But you should understand the difference between blocking URLs that are nasty and determining if your system is compromised.

Silencer's task is to defeat advertising domains. These domains may or may not be engaged in spyware activities. Ad-Aware will see if your system is compromised.

And Spychecker.com is your primary tool in furthering the use of spyware. Use only those applications that are listed at Spychecker.com!

And why not download our excellent desktop tool in GREEN and BLACK? It is very sexy and very evil looking and REALLY REALLY COOL - and I know you will love this next part: It's for FREE!

Thank you for writing! If there is anything else you can do for us, please let us know!

Kind Regards,

Fidel